Snapshots Along Memory Lane

My sister [CathM] tagged me and its a challenge... 15 Influences. Name things that have impacted my life for better or worse. Everything seems to have affected me in some way & I believe nothing is mere accident or coincidence. Things happen for a reason whether we ever discover the reason or not. I digress... here is my list [with the lessons learned] in no particular order.

1. My family. How I love my family. My parents and three siblings were the earliest and strongest influences on my life. Mine was a strict family, organized and no nonsense, with the best of intentions but not always the best of approaches to realize those intentions. My sister is a year older so I've never known life without her. My younger brother, by four years, has always been close to me even though we are very different in many ways. Then there's my baby brother, only ten years old, who has touched my life in amazing ways. How I love my family. THEY SHOWED ME THE IMPORTANCE OF EDUCATION & HARD WORK, AND TO BE GENEROUS & GOOD TO PEOPLE.
   
2. Boarding school. Mixed feelings. I first left home at 10 to attend a U.K. boarding school. First we were in Shropshire (my sister and I), then moved to Kent. Boarding school life added to what I got from home, strict discipline and no nonsense behaviour. I became mature & independent that young. My tender impressionable mind absorbed everything I was told (no room to question any of it) with dire consequences later in life. I've learned much how not to raise a child. Mixed feelings. IT TAUGHT ME INDEPENDENCE, ETIQUETTE & TO BE ARTICULATE.
   
3. God. Ever present. I guess He was always there but my acknowledgment of His role in my life never surfaced to conscious levels. My family went to church every Sunday. In primary school I attended (Bible) Story Club every Monday and took Religious Knowledge as a subject. Boarding school mandated Religious Studies too and weekly Sunday Service. Then I survived college without ever entering a church... except the time Gina told me to go see a dead body laid for viewing at the chapel. It was when I transferred to Nigeria after second year of medical school that I began to contemplate God as a part of my life. I would live in Nigeria for the next 9 years- one of the most trying chapters of my life. Another most challenging time of my life is now... it began the first time I ever heard of a place called Hinesville. Ever present. HE SHOWS ME THAT I NEED SOMETHING TO BELIEVE IN; TO KEEP ME GROUNDED.
   
4. The 1980s. I'll forever love the '80s music.Those were my high school years (boarding school), a formative period in my development. The culture then, fashion, art, history, music, etc was all soaked in and has remained with me ever since. Oh sweet nostalgia as the memories come trickling out. I'll forever love the '80s music. I LEARNED THAT LIFE SHOULD BE FUN & MUSIC IS A WELCOME ESCAPE OR RETREAT.
   
5. Water. The amazing energy of a turbulent sea. Growing up in Israel I have fond childhood memories of trips to Nahariya, Eilat, Lake Tiberias... walks along the shore, wading in the water, boat rides, fishing with family friends. I first learned to swim in Oswestry, England and remember swimming practices at the leisure center. Then it was a chore & not really something I enjoyed. In Kent the school had its own pool and my best friend, Helen, was drawn to water like fish; so I grew to love being in the water even if I still couldn't master the front crawl. I've experienced the Mediterranean, the Dead Sea, the Atlantic Ocean while at Ghana's La Palm Hotel, the Caribbean Sea... Med school in Grenada was memorable. I went to lectures with my bathing suit under my clothes & as soon as we let out I was headed straight for the water. The lovely secluded beaches. One day a friend and I joined some fishermen out to sea. In the middle of the sea I climbed out of the boat to feel the power of the sea... a lone head bobbing on the water. In Cyprus I once stayed at a waterfront hotel. I stood on the balcony watching ferocious waves lash upon the beach while the storm raged all night. The amazing energy of a turbulent sea. LIFE IS UNDULATING- PEAKS WITH ENERGIES THAT REVIVE & NADIRS THAT CALMLY SOBER.
6. Media. I don't know whether their good outweigh their bad. I was never skinny but I don't think I was fat as a child. At least not fat enough to be teased, not fat enough for my parents to be concerned and not fat enough to even worry about it. But I did worry. Obsessing about my weight began in high school, all thanks to fashion magazines like Vogue, Cosmopolitan and Elle; and television and music celebrities that reminded me that thin was in. After decades of tears and weight loss tactics, I have become less obsessed. Now the same media tells me to love myself as I am and focus on staying healthy while enjoying the simple pleasures of life... for me this includes the occasional chocolate-covered pretzel or peanut butter wafers. I don't know whether their good outweigh their bad. LEARN FROM BOTH GOOD & BAD- APPLY THE GOOD & AVOID THE BAD.
   
7. Queen Latifah. She's great. She's not much older than me but subconsciously has helped to inspire me. I find her beautiful both inside and out. She radiates self confidence and inner strength. She is well spoken and accomplished too. She's great. BE YOUR BEST BECAUSE YOU MIGHT BE A ROLE MODEL FOR SOMEONE WITHOUT KNOWING.
   
8. Janet Jackson. There's a gentleness to her that is becoming. A friend in high school adored her. Although I've never desired fame or been overtly inclined towards the arts per se, witnessing her life through the eyes of the media has taught me that everyone has struggles of some sort. However, when you stumble you don't have to fall. You can get back up and keep on going until you get to where you want to be. There's a gentleness to her that is becoming. BELIEVE IN YOUR DESTINY FOR YOU SHALL GET THERE.
9. Kindness. A gift to give and receive. I saw my parents as generous and kind. I saw our family friends and other friends in our U.N. community in Israel the same way. Naively I thought all people were good. Somewhere, somehow, this translated my desire to be kind and help people into a desire to become a doctor. For the most part I was always treated with kindness and when I wasn't, I often perceived a good intention behind the act anyway. A gift to give and receive. BE KIND REGARDLESS OF THE CIRCUMSTANCES.
10. Principle. An addiction. My father is a man of enviable principle. I grew up knowing that to be principled is a good quality. Yet our family was extreme. I became driven by, and mastered, principle, logic and common sense. If something doesn't make sense then I might get disoriented and vexed until it makes sense. Maybe that's why I excelled in Math, because I was born to figure things out? Now I see it as a weakness... an addiction according to Joyce Meyer, and I'm working hard to let it go. Things won't always make sense and having what the Americans call a melt down (I laugh anytime I hear this phrase; like a snowman by a fireplace or a popsicle in an oven) will never solve a problem. An addiction. ITS GOOD TO UNDERSTAND THINGS BUT DON'T LEAVE THE BIG PICTURE TO FOCUS ON THE TINY PIXELS.
11. Physical Activity. Good health goes a long way. My father is a believer in exercise and used to play football [i.e. soccer]. He loved to walk and this is what got me into physical exercise. I ran many races in Elementary school and got into Athletics in Secondary school. I played sports because I enjoyed them, not because I was good... but I did win the 100meter sprints many a time. Over the years I've engaged in tennis, badminton, squash, ping pong, volleyball, netball, field hockey, rounders, swimming, and was on the crew team in college... but nowadays I mainly run/jog/walk and hit the gym & join group aerobics whenever I get a chance. Thanks to God, I've been a pretty healthy person. You can't buy good health. Good health goes a long way. DO YOUR PART TO BE HEALTHY & MAKE HEALTH A PRIORITY.
    
12. My Husband. God's grace is sufficient. A recent addition to my life, my husband obviously had no influence in my life before now. However, in the last nine months he has affected me greatly and I wonder to what extent he shall continue to influence me in future? Will he ever be a strong influence in my life? It seems that sometimes we allow ourselves to be influenced while other times we just get influenced and its beyond our control. Hmmm... we've got to actively resist negative influence as we graciously accept the positive. God's grace is sufficient. DO RIGHT BECAUSE YOUR BEHAVIOUR INFLUENCES THOSE AROUND YOU.
    
13. Culture. The Power of Culture. I was born in Congo (the People's Republic of) and believe that this Francophone culture has some yet unrealized influence on me. However, my family is Nigerian and their culture certainly runs through my veins. I grew up in the Middle East and was blessed by the Israeli and Arab ways of life... these cultures similarly have a definite thread running through every aspect of who I am. My years in the U.K. transformed me tremendously and college in the U.S. and Med school in Grenada further shaped and molded the clay that is me. Moving to Nigeria for 9 years and then working in Liberia added to who I became. Back in America since 2006 I am still growing as a result of the exciting and amazing influence of culture. The Power of Culture. LOVE ALL PEOPLES & EMBRACE ALL CULTURES.
    
14. Dreams. Happy are those who dream dreams and are ready to pay the price to make them come true - Leon Joseph Cardinal Suenens. I was an avid daydreamer. It was my favourite pasttime and I loved having nothing else to do because it afforded me time to slip into my dreamworld for a moment. I daydreamed so much that I thought it highly abnormal. I created so many stories in my head, led different lives, perfected plans to change the world and make it a better place; thought up ways to make others happy, planned a happy future; My dreams were never like goals or ambitions, just fantasies. Nevertheless I believe that dreams have a positive correlation with drive to succeed. Just like I blogged a piece on doodling, I might post something on dreams... both real dreams & daydreams. Happy are those who dream dreams and are ready to pay the price to make them come true - Leon Joseph Cardinal Suenens. DREAMS CAN PREPARE YOU OR PROPEL YOU TO YOUR DESTINY.
    
15. Experiences. The best teacher. Like I said ab initio, everything in life seems to have affected me in some manner, whether positively or negatively. The night a man broke into my apartment- a year later I still see his face. The night a mini-bus almost ran me over as I crossed a busy street. The night I walked home from a late shift at the hospital- so dark, no street lights, no cars about, and a torrential downpour typical of West African rainy season. The time I was caught in a violent wave on the sea that threw me unto the beach sparing me a violent end. The night I got a phonecall that my family had been invaded by armed robbers. The time I got the message that mom had been in an accident [she's still recovering]. Working at a mission hospital. Volunteering with UNV. Going to a food shelter. Meeting victims of child trafficking. Seeing seven dead bodies by the side of a road. Speaking with an uncle [family friend] before he died. Watching my grandmother die. The day I helped deliver my good friend's baby [they made sure I was on call]. The boy in the ward with Ameloblastoma- jaw tumor. While all that has happened to me has been significant, things that have affected others have also sometimes happened to me... lessons learned. The best teacher. USE YOUR EXPERIENCES & THOSE OF OTHERS TO BECOME A BETTER PERSON.
    

Alas, I've hit 15 influences so let me stop here lest I go on and on. It started as a challenge & turned out to be cathartic, therapeutic and liberating. Thanks my sister for tagging me. And thanks Linda S [whose page I shall visit again] for neither of you would have known that I needed this healing exercise when you got the "tag" ball rolling and sent it my way. Thanks readers for reading and I invite you all to try this Tag: 15 Influences.